Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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