I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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