i just google imaged poop.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
