you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
