bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Everything about him screamed your future.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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