Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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