I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize