I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
