Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
