I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize