That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize