Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
