yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
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We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
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Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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