dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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