Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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