i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
