I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
