when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
i drank out of a bidet.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize