fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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