he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
