So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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