What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
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