I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
