You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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