Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
