What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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