i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
