i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
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