Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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