All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize