we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
