No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
