how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
