just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
