I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
