I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
