i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
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