yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
