I thought spray tan was a myth
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
21 MILFs That Made The Boys Crazy
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
23 Ladies Who Have Mastered The Art Of Squirting
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder