Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
