Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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