He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
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Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Found your dick twin last night
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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