Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Let's get the cat blown out
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
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