cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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