are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
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just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
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