i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize