About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
