omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
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Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
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I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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