I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
