Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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