i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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